Hank, Jr. Moves On to Greater Things

Nashville, TN. Hank Williams, Jr. may be bloodied but he remains unbowed after his dismissal from ESPN's Monday Night Football. Writing on his website, Bocephus declares, with many eerily Teutonic-like capitalized words:

“After reading hundreds of e-mails, I have made MY decision,” the singer wrote. “By pulling my opening Oct 3rd, You (ESPN) stepped on the Toes of The First Amendment.”
“Freedom of Speech, so therefore Me, My Song, and All My Rowdy Friends are OUT OF HERE. It’s been a great run.”

Asked what his plans are, the musician replied, "Well, I have a Piggly Wiggly opening in West Hawkins in a week, then the Sons of the Confederacy Picnic next month in Jefferson City. Then at Christmas we have a White Aryan Resistance dance at the Legion Hall in Forksburg. I'm gonna be busier than a cow's tail in fly season."

But this is not all that will be occupying the Rowdy One in coming months. A new book is in the works, Are You Ready for Some Foot in the Balls, Ni**er? s well as his own fragrance for white males, Bocephus.

"It's smells like Jack Daniels, gunpowder and tire marks with just a hint of white musk. We're also working on a line of Confederate flag clothing for children, called Webel Webel and my favorite, a line of bedding, all in white of course."

© 2011 Kona Lowell